The funniest thing I've found in a long while, been keeping a few of us giggling sporadically for a couple of weeks now. In a UGC, social media, content-focussed blah blah blah - for everyone who's had enough bullshit, brainwashing and bollocks - here's a site that proudly claims to be "the content-free encyclopedia"
A random smattering of snippets to whet your comedy appetites:
- A Kitten sniper during the wars. These were the deadliest kittens living on earth.
- “If war was a tangible object I would insert my penis into the inside of it.”
George W Bush on what he actually thinks of war
- Peace is the concept of having lots of drugs, hugging a couple of trees and then talking about things that only make sense when you are really drunk (or high). Now peace is a word used to win votes and make your friends laugh at parties.
- “Mass is the opiate of the religious.”
~ Karl Marx on Roman Catholicism
- Religion is a mental disease usually brought on by infection by the group VI reverse transcribing DNA virus called faith. Symptoms involve believing something just because someone (or occasionally a book), somewhere, says it's true. In this respect religion can be considered the chronic form of the lesser mental disorder gullibility. For synonyms, see bullshit. The official catch phrase of religion is "Give us your money, and you will have a good afterlife!"
Uncyclopedia
12/21/2006
Uncyclopedia
Stumble it!Japanese Shop
This is a Japanese shop in Brighton between the Old Steine & Preston Circus somewhere. I appreciated how much work it must've taken to craft such a striking shop front - it's aesthetically quite striking at night surrounded by what I'd guess are terraced Victorian houses.
The photo doesn't do it justice - I should've crossed the road and got closer, hmm maybe I'll go back soon.
Visual Scratching
Very funky visualisation of vinyl scratching - looks like on a G$ powerbook. Imagine a club's lighting rig projected over/above a crowd with this level of response to any sort of club music - but particularly imagine a turntablist feast of scratchtastic, light-jumping visual-chaos - well, it looks pretty sick in my head...
Oh yeah, and if you can code the visualisation of that, then it can't be hard to log the scratches, and from there create a library of your DJ sets - to licence out? to share/compare online web2.0 style - ratemyscratch/ratemyvisualscratch.com - or maybe battle a visualised playback of another one of your sets - or even a scratchified version of Chess's Big Blue vs Mankind DJ battle series...?
The Fast Track to Enlightenment
I think this is St Peter's Church in Brighton.
I liked the idea of captuing the fast pace of modern life/transport in front of the static, stone monument to a religious behemoth not known for dynamicism, change or movement.
Last Cloud to Whitehawk?
Anybody unfortunate enough to be familiar with Terry Garage-Grin's shitty old Southern FM show 'last bus to whitehawk'should recognise this area. On the outskirts of what's really considered Whitehawk's heart, I took this picture of weather rolling in from the coast.
I'm standing opposite Lidl on the road that leads up from the Royal Sussex Hospital.
Those old gas holders have always fascinated me - like big industrial lungs I remember watching them from train windows as a kid, rising and falling, each new visit giving a snapshot as to just how much resource we use.
12/05/2006
O'Reilly?
I was reading an article written by a Mr Tim o'Reilly today, who was introduced as the man who coined the phrase 'Web 2.0' - so given that this is a weblog, the most soical of media, i thought it only fair and sensible to listen to what he had to say.
In the shouty, crowded debate about the future of the web, the monetisation of 'social media' and all things 2.0, everyone is searching (excuse the pun)for "The next big Bling" as I'll call it. In short - a way to harness and monetise the world wide web in the way that Google have succeeded so well with Search & AdWords.
Having digested a few articles from the current issue of NMA magazine I've drawn some conclusions/stolen some ideas/had some musings:
1. He who conquers my mobile phones contacts book will be He who begins to define truly 'social' media. Linking up wi-fi, WAP, GPRS and social networking communities with the mobile phone and the personal contact information it holds, will be onto a BIG BIG winner.
2. Bluetooth is great - popular for its convenience, the long range being unobtrusive - amongst youngsters like myself (and much younger!) it is THE favourite way of communicating. MyBluetoothSpace anyone? BlueTube?
3. Bluetooth seems a useful marketing tool for public companies, large institutions and the such like, where the data being sent/broadcast is something people either want, or will make them think - early examples include Universities distributing their prospectus, but could envelope personal timetables, lecture notes etc.
4. Paid Search is a tool that can be used for management of negative PR - ranking above news aggregators and blogs which will never be outranked organically is a fine way to istribute your brand message relevant to a product recall, some bad press...
5. New media agencies, digital producers - all businesses in fact that have a wealth of in-house knowledge that is specialist and evolving
12/04/2006
Tuc-Tu...c
Clever, environmentally friendly (?are they? anybody know? they run on LPG I think...?), as classy as a lawnmower but cooler than a cucumber - the ubiquitous Brighton & Hove Tuc-Tucs have taken the city by storm over the summer months. The winter poses a new challenge for these little Asian minibuses.
Their route's been shifted from the wind-battered sea-front and now serves Hove Station in addition to Brighton Station, the Clock Tower & Brighton Marina. For just £3 a-day, on a set route they're cheaper than a rush-hour bus ticket (CitySaver £3.20 before 9am) and we've all read the legal fury they've whipped-up in the ever cheerful (!) local minicab drivers.
Alas, I have sad news, these pint-sized gladiators of the Sussex transport world aren't infallible, and I couldn't resist snapping this chirpy little Tuc-Tuc being taken off some a bit of winter-love - I just hope that the icy-Solent winds don't make the little blighters all seize up with European cold & flu - all together now - aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh!
Posts that contain Tuc Tuc per day for the last 30 days.
Get your own chart!
Sussex Firefighter Die in Blaze
2 firefighters died in an exploding inferno of fireworks in a "huge blaze" near Lewes in East Sussex today. A large mushroom cloud (pictured) was seen by residents. The blaze was left to burn-out overnight as emergency services withdrew to a safe distance.
The blaze comes only a few weeks after nearby Lewes witnessed one of the largest gatherings of firework displays seen in the UK. With Protestant roots this is an area of the south coast that has always been fascinated by and famed for its fireworks.
Posts that contain Fireworks Blaze per day for the last 30 days.
Get your own chart!
11/28/2006
John the Revelator
Creative satire of the highest order - I want to see this made the official video, and Depeche Mode to perform to it live on Fox...
How to Make a Genius: Part One
Evil, flattened. I did something similar when I was a small boy. My sister refused to read me a Danger Mouse Annual - I jumped...
This is a Polar Light Bear. They are very rare. There are two young men who have been lucky enough to touch one of these rare creatures.
Their natural habitat is The Lanes in Brighton, England. They usually come out only at night, and are distinctive by the nature of their fluorescent fur.
Although they may look larger, this is an optical illusion and they are in fact the size of a large pea.
Trains Sleeping
This is what trains at Hove station look like when they're asleep. Some people who have a Stop Smoking shop next door have been crying about the fact that the trains park here now. I don't know why. I don't care. Trains are better when they're not moving though I guess. Unless you need to get somewhere of course...hmmm...I know someone who gets a train from this station eeeeeevery day. Hello!
Donnie Danko?
These guys are Canadian, have bucketloads of charisma, a frontman with the most unashamedly rock n roll voice I've heard in a long while - and - a sense of humour!
Are YOU Wearing Purple yet?
Ukranian/New York Gypsy Punk.
A thing to behold. A thing to dazzle your aural canals and whisk you away into another world. A world of colour, passion and insanity. Live? Watch out for ladies on drums, pushing, shoving and loving. I saw these guys in the Brighton Dome - my phone got stolen, my cashcard lost and my fancy specs knocked off my face and smashed. Was it worth it?
Watch the video. Start jumping. Decide for yourself.
Gyasi Went Home
A beautiful video of Gyasi (the bassist from Bedouin Soundclash) on a trip home to Ghana. If you get the chance to catch Bedouin Soundclash live - Go! Take your friends!
